Most of all, I know this for sure—I don’t want to lose the passion I cultivated and I want to use my story to inspire that fire in others to advocate for children—any and all children, China and everywhere. I need to work harder to be an example to the children in my own family so that one day they might take over and do more for the disadvantaged than our generation did. This world should not be about who gets ahead, who has the nicest car or the biggest house—We shouldn’t obsess about what colleges our kids will go to or how successful they will be if we just push them a little harder or force them to join one more sport or club. Wouldn’t this world be a better place if we concentrated more on molding the younger generation to be more compassionate to those around them, to reach out to people in their lives and give a helping hand? What if we gave equal time to community outreach that we do to organized sports and activities? The important thing to remember is that when the children become adults and find their passion, they will find their peace.

A girl who has seen much more of the ugly world than she should have at the age of 13.

A girl who has a long road ahead to overcome the tragedies she has been forced to bear.

During the first five minutes of our conversation I thought what I had been told about her must be untrue, that the child who sat before me was not capable of her alleged actions and the smile that radiated across her face could not have hidden such anger and resentment at the world. When we began to talk and she started to unravel the story of her life to me, the flash of anger in her eyes did not go unnoticed—the wall of defensiveness around her was evident in the sudden tightness of her shoulders and the way she sat ready to pounce at any given moment. But still, the bits of the little girl she once was pulled me in and captivated me to believe that perhaps if I convinced her that I am on her side and will do what I can to help her, that she will be able to focus on a future that does not balance on a repetitive cycle of chaos and pain. After we got the ugly stuff out of the way and I assured her that I believed her and was outraged on her behalf, I guided her towards thoughts of ‘what can be’ instead of ‘what is.” We talked about her dreams and goals and I discovered she wants to be a nurse and desires to help people. Some might find that ironic, considering her history of lashing out at those around her, but I see her antics for what they are—a child screaming for someone to stand in her court and to believe her when she voices the crimes against her.

At our second meeting she was depressed and almost unreachable, but I knew somewhere underneath she was listening to me and waiting to see if I’d give up and walk away. I decided to avoid hard subjects and focus on putting her mind at ease. We talked—or at least I talked and she listened, with an emotionless expression on her face. But I continued to talk and told her about my morning with my cat who had gifted us with a baby rabbit and a baby mole at our doorstep that morning. Possibly a morbid story—but as I joked about my killer kitty’s adventures, the small smile I saw creeping across the face of the child before me was my reward. Just a few silly words but enough to pull her away from her dark world for a brief time before she shut me out again. As I said goodbye and reminded her that I’d be back to visit, I could see the doubt flicker across her face.

To learn more about the role of a CASA, see their website at www.casaforchildren.org

First of all, if you have not become my facebook friend, please do so now here. I frequently post needs on my profile page and give people the opportunity to discuss issues and lend a helping hand.

If you want to read more about what it is like for children in a Chinese orphanage, which is similar in many institutes all over the world in regards to neglect and abuse, please order my book, Silent Tears.

When people ask me what they can do, my heart jumps at the chance to ask them to consider sponsoring foster care for Chinese orphans. With my own eyes I saw the way a child would change once being a part of a foster family for a short time–how a tiny bit of love and attention would bring out their little personalities and they would flourish. If you are interested in sponsoring a Chinese orphan for foster care, the average cost is $35 or so a month. Some amazing organizations you can work with that I’d recommend are Pearl River Outreach, Love Without Boundaries, and Half The Sky.

Find out how to start an orphan ministry in your church at Hope For Orphans.

If China does not tug on your heart but you still feel you would be an awesome advocate for children, do something for those in your community, church or school.

Zip Up A Smile Project:
This project was successful for me in a Chinese hospital as well as at an American family shelter. Collect gallon sized bags filled with ‘welcome’ items for a child. Toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, brush, small toy, small book and a snack. Punch holes in the top and thread ribbon through. Drop collections at your local shelter.

Zip Up the Warmth Project:
Collect warm coats for underprivileged children in your area or for the local children’s shelter. I coordinated this project for a neighborhood of children and the children were so grateful to receive new coats to wear.

Become a CASA volunteer: The mission of the National Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) Association, together with its state and local members, is to support and promote court-appointed volunteer advocacy for abused and neglected children so that they can thrive in safe, permanent homes.

Not all of us can do something huge, but no act of kindness is too small. Life can be cruel and throw a lot of curve balls at you, but speaking from experience I can tell you that when you focus on the needs of others, your own problems no longer seem so insurmountable. Most importantly, there are children all over the world who need your help. To turn away is to be part of the problem instead of the solution. We can all do something, big or small.

Thank you.

From Julie:
We are soon all heading towards the dining room where we hear music and as I strain to see over the top of heads I see two of the girls who are about 10 or 11 dancing with the Red Cross support group. As the music stops, Katja and I are grabbed and persuaded to sing for the children: we do our rendition of ‘heads, shoulders, knees and toes’ along with the actions and then we join the support group and everyone else with the Chinese Happy New Year to You. It was wonderful, not a dry eye in the house, this is proving to be a very emotional day. No sooner had the music stopped and every one of the children are lining up for lunch. This is a very special lunch and one we can thank you our supporters for, as we, with your help have donated money for this special meal, which we all shared together as one very big happy family. After lunch it was time for MiFan MaMa to give red envelopes to the Mummies and Daddies on your behalf, what better way to let them know we really appreciate all they do on a daily basis for these children.

During all this time there wasn’t much time for game playing or painting with the children but the people from our bus were busy visiting those children that cannot get out of bed, those who stare at four walls and a ceiling all day and never complain. Thanks to King Koil these children are comfy in the mattresses they have especially made for them.

We then had a time of exploring and getting to know the children and where they live; a very precious time. These children have come to accept us as their family as have their Mummies and Daddies. Communication is always a small problem, just a feeling of small frustration on our part but love soon shows us there are no barriers – everyone wants a hug and very soon get it.

Everlasting friendships are forged, just as all from our bus will not forget these wonderful children; the children will never forget them and their love and kindness.

We all pose for photos – everyone wants to capture this very special moment.

The volunteer from the Red Cross tells Katja and myself about a family who are all very severely ill. We agree to supply food for this family as they have no money and their plight has already been shown on Chinese TV. (Roy has already investigated this, so we know there is a real need). We give the Red Cross Volunteer enough money to buy this family rice, flour and oil for 6 months. In addition we are able to give them a bag of rice, flour and a bottle of oil from Lao Wang’s supply. The man from the Red Cross asks that we deliver these items personally on the way home: he assures us it is on our way. So we agree and he joins us on our bus with 3 volunteers for our return journey.

All too soon it is time to say goodbye to everyone and lots of tears are shed on both sides. Although we will be back in one month and these children and everyone here has a place in our hearts it is still so sad. One of the Mummies is hugging me crying and thanking us for all we do. I tell her it is us who thank them as they are the ones who look after these children 24 hours a day, everyday. They are the one who teach these children love and caring by their example, how lucky these children are for although their possessions are few their hearts are bursting with LOVE and CARING and SHARING. We have the privilege to have been a part of this, to have experienced this, even if only for a short time.

Then we get on the bus some passengers are leaning out of the window sharing a last handshake with these wonderful people. Soon we are driving down the road, we wave, and they wave, and soon are just dots in the distance. The bus is silent: we have all had different experiences on this visit, each of us has our own treasured memories to take away until we visit the next time.

We now have the Red Cross volunteer and his helpers on the bus, but on further investigation we find it will take us an extra 5 hours to make this visit to this family. Unfortunately this is not possible, as lots of people on the bus must get to work the next day and even now we will not arrive home until 12.00 midnight. We agree to sort the Red Cross team out another car and further down the highway we stop and there is another car waiting, we all exchange hugs and greetings for this family, and then we part.

1. Be a foster parent
2. Be a respite volunteer for foster parents
3. Sponsor a child to be in foster care overseas
4. Make a monetary donation to an orphan care organization
5. Do a fund-raising drive or volunteer your time for local children’s shelter
6. Adopt!
7. Join CASA
8. Start an orphan care ministry in your church or school
9. Teach YOUR children to reach out to other disadvantaged children in the community or overseas

There are many children out there who need someone to reach out to them or to be their voice. YOU can make a difference!

o Serving as a foster care respite provider–give a foster couple a weekend alone with no children, or host the foster child(ren) for the holidays.
o Serving on a citizen’s review panel in your county
o Participating in Secret Santa and other events–sponsor foster children for Christmas!
o Operating a clothing closet or food pantry
o Sharing information about foster parenting at your place of work or worship, and other areas of the community
o Becoming a Court-Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) I knew a woman in China who when she lived in the states was a CASA and she loved it! She said it was the most rewarding years of her life.
Contact your local DFCS office if you are interested in volunteering for any of these activities.

You can also coordinate projects in your neighborhood, church, school or mom’s club. Here are a few that I have done over the years. (I always like to name my project because people like to be a part of something that sounds official!)

Zip Up A Smile
My friend, Candee and I coordinated this project in China for the local children’s hospital as well as here in the states for a local children’s shelter. Put together gallon-sized Ziploc bags with snacks, toothbrush/paste, shampoo, soap, small toys or books. Punch ribbons through the top and pass out to children in need. We gathered enough for the staff of the children’s shelter to hand out for one year of admissions, and it was wonderful to know that on that child’s arrival to a scary place, they’d be handed a small bag of cheer. It is so easy and fun to coordinate!

Zip Up the Warmth
This was a project I coordinated through my company to gather coats for children in one low-income apartment complex. We worked with a non-profit organization that was familiar with the kids, got index cards with each child’s name, gender and size. Each child received a new coat and a backpack the week before Thanksgiving.

Operation China Warm-Up
Gather sweaters for children in an orphanage and send overseas. You can even be the drop-off and then locate a non-profit who will ship the goods for you.

Don’t just wait for someone else to step up—the children of the world are the responsibility of everyone. Reach out and you will be the one who is blessed! If you do any of these, please write me and send me details so I can share and inspire others with your story!

If you would like to pick up a sweater or two and mail it to me, I will be sending off a box of sweaters to two orphanages. I cannot say which, as one was the orphanage I wrote about in Silent Tears; A Journey of Hope in a Chinese Orphanage. You may not know exactly where it is located but I can promise you that the children will benefit from your gift of warmth.

Please only send sweaters with buttons or zippers, as these are the most convenient for the orphanage ayis to use. Size 6 month and larger needed. You can email me at kaybratt70@hotmail.com for the address to mail your donation to.

Our family has always played the lottery game–you know the one, the “What would you do if you won the lottery?” My answer for as long as I can remember has been, “I would open a big facility in China where I could take care of orphans the way they should be cared for–with love, patience and helping them through whatever issues that brought them there.”

I’ve never won the lottery and am still not able to follow that dream but I remember the day I was surfing the net to find current news about China and it’s orphans. I came across the Show Hope website and when I opened the link titled Maria’s Big House of Hope, a chill went down my spine.

It was described exactly how I’d always dreamed I would spend my lottery money on. Here is a tidbit of the description– read how wonderful it is….

Show Hope is proud to officially announce the opening of this exciting project that will provide love and care for orphans throughout China who are in desperate need of surgeries and special medical attention.

Located in Luoyang, which is in the Henan province and has a population of around 6 million people, this caring facility will be a beacon of hope to the people of China and the world. Henan is one of the poorest provinces in all of China. The state-run Luoyang orphanage takes care of nearly 700 children and ends up with most of the “special needs” orphans from all around Henan. Maria’s Big House of Hope is a 6 story building that will be equipped with everything needed to care for orphans with special needs. Every child in this facility will be 5 years old or younger, and these will represent some of the neediest orphans in China.

The Fourth Floor is the one I would want to be a part of:

The fourth floor is dedicated to hospice care for children who are terminal. This floor contains 28 beds. Other rooms include a medical room /intensive care room, main emergency room, and isolation room. Every new child will be brought to the fourth floor to be evaluated, registered, and diagnosed. They will then be sent, depending on how severe their ailments, to the corresponding floor. Robin and Joyce want to make the children as comfortable as possible before they pass.

If you are looking for a way to help China’s orphans, please consider donating to this amazing mission. This isn’t my organization and I am not linked to it in any way. I have never even met anyone that is affiliated with it, but because I have been on the front lines of the orphan’s battleground and seen the need first-hand day in and day out, I believe in this house and what it would mean to the children. If you do too, you can donate HERE.

Thank you.
Kay